Everything In Between
by fadingvoice
Summary: Sequel to That Summer. Really, it's a mix of a few of Sarah Dessen's books, with an older Haven as the main character.
1. Changing Of Times

A soft touch upon my face that slowly faded. I could still feel it though. I knew that it'd happened, and I wouldn't let go of it. I wouldn't let myself forget as I'd done so many times before. I'd let myself forget so many touches before, but this one I refused to let go of. This touch was forever.

It's pretty simple to believe in love when it smacks you in the face, or even pushes you off a cliff; but it's harder to believe in love when it's gradual, coming about slowly. So slowly, that it doesn't seem like love at all, even. More like a relationship (not just romantically) that's grown into something stronger, but you're so used to it, that the shock and specialness of it has worn off. It's like a kiss, in a way, it's special the first time, but all the kisses after that seem almost…normal, routine. As though it were part of the system that we call dating.

Two years. Two years since Ashley married Lewis. A lot had changed. Mom and I sold the house and moved into an apartment complex not too far from the newlyweds. Mom decided that she would go to Europe, as long as I checked in with Ashley every few hours so that she knew where I was. So for about a month, I fended for myself (unless I went over to Ashley's for dinner), and lived on my own. But now, it's two years later. Mom's back from Europe, feeling more alive and looking more beach matching than ever, Ashley and Lewis are settled into their own apartment, making my drama time with her minimum (thank you, Lewis), and I'm a senior in high school (17 years old).

I haven't seen Sumner since that day I got out of his car and started running, if that's what you were wondering. I did my best to avoid him, and as though by fate, we never ran into each other. I couldn't face him after all I'd built him up to be only to find out that he'd backstabbed my sister. I don't think of it as running away from facing that he's not the wonder guy I made him to be…I'm just avoiding it. I've done it for so long, it's good to keep an old friend around.

I did, however, get that new job I'd wanted. My new boss was reluctant to hire me, since Mom forced me to tell her what I'd done to the woman at Little Feet, but she decided to give me the benefit of the doubt; that, or she was extremely understaffed and needed whatever help she could get. I now work with the Wish Catering Service. Although, I do have to say that my boss is definitely an upgrade. She may be a little out of whack, but she's Delia, and you know that you'll never be bored. My co-workers are making the long nights, and grubbers, easier. There's Monica, ever so silent, but she'll speak in her native tongue occasionally. Kristy is out spiteful, "fashionable" one. She always reminds me to simply stamp on a grubbers' foot if they dare to take more than two of anything. Bert. I don't think there's any other word to describe him. He's really into the "end of the world" stuff, and he's still playing the "gottcha" game. Apparently, he used to be somewhat pudgy. However, now he has his brother's physic, hot in his own subtle way. Wes, however, is just that out there kind of hot. He's a few years older, haven't really bothered asking his age, considering that he's taken anyway. His girlfriend? That would be the last person working with Wish. Macy. Now, I don't ever intend on splitting them up, because they're the best couple ever, and I'm not really attracted to Wes as a person, I'm just acknowledging that was is physically…attractive. Anyway, I guess that gets you up to speed for where my story picks up again.


	2. Enjoy The Silence

Every Tuesday, Mom and I would go to Ashley and Lewis' apartment for dinner, as a way to "keep the family ties." This Tuesday, however, was one of those days when I wish that I could hear everything from the vent so that no one could get to see my expression. But not everything in our lives happens the way we want it to, and this moment certainly didn't.

"Mom," Ashley began, like she did all important moments; slowly and surely. "Haven. I'm pregnant!" Mom immediately started screaming, getting up from her seat to hug and congratulate them. I sat staring at my plate, filled with some random thing that Ashley had tried to cook. I refused to look up. Was I happy for Ashley? Yes. Was I scared? Heck yes. Was I thinking back to the summer in Virginia Beach where Sumner had kept our family laughing? You better believe it. It was times like those when my mind drifted back to my few months with Sumner. Everything seemed to make so much sense with him around, like he pieced me together. Two years later, I still felt like I needed him every now and again. I finally forced myself to look Ashley and Lewis in the eye.

"Congratulations," I stated blandly, as though the words weren't from my own mouth. What happened to the Ashley with a million dreams? Was she really giving them all up for a baby? The shrieks and hugs continued for another full five minutes before Lewis suggested that we let Ashley get some rest. We were at the front door when a question struck Mom.

"How far along is she?" Mom asked, a concerned looked upon her face, as though the couple was keeping something from her. Ashley squirmed under her gaze, but Lewis answered firmly.

"About three months."

"Three months?" Mom exclaimed angrily. "How could you not tell me, Ashley?" Lewis put an arm around Ashley's shoulder protectively.

"Well…" she took her time picking the best words. "We sort of didn't know…" she admitted. "Lewis made me go to the doctors today for a physical, and that's when they found out I was pregnant." Mom's hardened face fell, and she immediately went back to hugging Ashley. I took a deep sigh, making my way back to my chair.

"Haven, don't be so melodramatic," Ashley insisted. "It's not like Lewis and I are _that_ bad." I scoffed sarcastically, taking a look at the two of them together. They looked picture perfect, as they always did, as though they were trying to hide their flaws and any moment they'd break character and start beating the crap out of each other. So, just to spite me, Ashley continued the conversation for another five minutes. Finally, Mom and I were headed out the door, but I couldn't escape this baby business. Mom continued with her whole "I'm gonna be a grandma" crap all the way home. It's not that I wasn't happy for Ashley, it just reminded me that things were changing, as if Senior year wasn't enough of a smack in the face.

Once home, I listened to the messages to find one from someone I hadn't talked to in two years. Casey had left a message saying that she thought we should grab dinner sometime since, when we'd moved, I'd been moved to a different school, and she and I had drifted apart. We were different, you know? She was getting into her skin by having guys put their hands all over it, and I got into mine by simply living. I called her back, and set up a time for dinner the next night. The next message, however, was from one of Mom's co-workers had called. A _male_ co-worker. Mom was still best friends with Lydia, but apparently she'd been doing some sneaky flirting without her knowledge.

"Mom, some Dave guy called for you!" I called down the hall, where Mom was getting ready for bed. I could hear her squeal from her room as she rushed to the living room. She stopped dead when she saw that I was pressing the play button on the machine. "He left a number," I explained as I walked towards my room. Once locked inside, I could hear Mom on the phone with him, with a more cheery voice. Obviously she was flirting with him. I decided to shake it off, I'd done the same with Dad and the Weather Pet, hadn't I? Besides, it'd been years since the divorce, and she had a right to start searching for a guy who could give her what she wanted. I'd be at college soon, and all she'd have would be her dinners with Ashley and Lewis every Tuesday. Suddenly, Mom became quiet.

"Haven?" she called towards my room.

"Yeah?" I could hear Mom's footsteps coming down the hallway, and suddenly my bedroom door was opening.

"Delia's on the phone for you," she informed me. "But could you make it quick?" She didn't say it, but I knew that Dave was on the other end. "Oh! But don't hang up!"

"Got it," I assured her as I took the phone from her, placing the receiver to my ear.

"Haven?" Delia sounded exasperated on the other end. "Macy can't work tomorrow, can you cover?"

"What time?" I asked, looking at the post it where I'd written the time and place for my dinner with Casey.

"It's eight to around ten. I know it's a school night, and if you can't-"

"Don't worry, Delia, I can do it," I told her, hoping that I sounded reassuring.

"Thank you, Haven, really. You have no idea how much this means to me." Delia continued.

"Don't worry about it, I'll be there, but I've gotta go. See ya tomorrow!"

"Oh, alright. Bye!" I handed the phone back to Mom, watched her make sure that Dave was still on the other end. It was a little depressing, I'll admit. That I was 17 and still hadn't been on a date. Even my mom could get a date, but not me. 5' 11" (and a half), skinny as a stick, with a completely psychotic family. If I had nothing else going for me, I was under six foot.


	3. Stay

The next day in school, I ran into Bert, as I sometimes did. He was in my class, but he's what anyone would consider in the "advanced class." In other words, total geek.

"Hey, Haven!" he called from the other end of the hallway. He was only about an inch taller than me, so he could easily spot his tall counterpart from the other end of the hall. I lifted my hand dully, making my way to my class, but Bert persisted towards me. "You're working tonight ,right?"

"Yep." He nodded, looking in an opposite direction.

"Isn't it awesome how late we get to stay out on a school night?" I nodded, not really meaning it. Mom always let me stay out late for work, you'd think that Wes wouldn't give Bert a bedtime. "Well, some of us might go out after that, do you think you might wanna come?" I looked at him for a moment, noticing that he was irking to just walk away at that moment, noticing that the time until the next bell was running short.

"It's a school night, Bert. Let's not overdo it." He looked disappointed for a moment, but he regained his smile quickly.

"You're right, sorry. I forgot to think of that. Maybe this weekend." He said it as a statement, but it sounded more like a question.

"Yeah. Definitely. This weekend." His smile broadened and he rushed back into the hallway. Once in my classroom I took my seat next to a boy named Macon. Weird name, I always thought. Anyway, he was known as the bad boy on campus, skipping class whenever he felt like and such. He was especially popular with all the girls who hadn't yet come into their own skin. At least, Elizabeth, the girl he was dating when I first came here, definitely wasn't in her own skin.

"Hey," he greeted as I took out my books from my backpack.

"Hi," I replied, forcing a slight smile.

"Did you do the homework?" he asked, a smirk appearing upon his face.

"Yeah." I'd gone through this conversation with him before. He asks, I tell and ask if he did his, he asks to copy.

"Wow. You really are smart." He looked at me in anticipation of my reply.

"Yeah, I know." He took a moment to think of his response.

"I really wish you'd share your knowledge with me." My time bomb had gone off.

"Well, I wish for world peace; but it's not happening is it?" I asked sarcastically. For a moment, he was taken aback, but his smirk soon returned.

"You've got a lot of tension," he informed me (even though I already knew that). "Maybe some time I could help you relieve that." His hand was moving towards mine, I glared at him. As if sensing my anger, he thought better of it, and it back.

"No thanks, I do yoga." Although this was completely untrue, it sounds like a good thing to say. Supposedly, yoga relieved stress. Now, this moment seems completely unimportant, but Macon plays into the story. My story.


	4. Say Goodbye

My dinner with Casey was scheduled for five o'clock. Of course, she showed up around 5:30. It still left plenty of time to catch up before work, but it was still annoying that she wasn't on time. Then again, she never had been.

"Hey," she greeted as she took a seat across from me. "Already ordered?"

"Nope. But I'm ready whenever you are."

"I come here a lot," she stated. "I'm ready." A minute later, the waiter came and took our order. "_He's _the reason." She was posting to the guy who'd just taken our order. I nodded, but thought that he wasn't anything special. Just another guy.

"So, why'd you call me?" I asked bluntly. She didn't seem bothered at all by it.

"I don't know, it just seemed sort of weird…" she explained. "You know? How we had that falling out?" I nodded, even though I really didn't consider it a falling out. "It just seems like a shame, because we were friends for so long." I looked Casey over, trying to recall what he'd looked like two years ago. She looked different now, her hair dyed a bright blond, blue eye makeup, plumb lips, and a dangerously low top that I feared would fall off of her at any moment.

"We were friends for a long time," I agreed. She nodded. Our conversation stopped for a moment as the waiter brought back our drinks.

"Thanks, John" she said all too flirtatiously. Without replying to her, this "John" had left.

"On friendly terms with the waiter?" I questioned.

"Working on it." Obviously. "He's 24, college guy, starving musician."

"He works at a restaurant, how starving can he be?" Casey looked at me for a moment, then smiled.

"You still don't understand. You haven't been in love." I shook my head, knowing that saying I had would've been a lie.

"And how many times have you been in love?" Sarcasm always worked. She took a sip of her drink, then replied.

"Uh…five or six times. But some of them weren't real love, you know?"

"How do you define _real love_?"

"You know. Sex." My eyes widened in surprise a bit. I knew she was fast, and I'd figured that she would eventually, but now? Before college? "Oh, come on, Haven! You knew that I'd lose it eventually."

"How many?" She acted like she didn't know what I was talking about, then gave up the game.

"Three." I nodded. "So, let's get back to what I called you for. Why didn't you call me?" The waiter brought our food.

"What do you mean? I called you three times, and you never called me back. I even left my number on your answering machine."

"You should've called back. I was busy."

"So you wanted me to call and hope that it fit into your schedule at the time?"

"No, Haven, that's not it. Don't make it seem like a big deal." I shook my head, frustrated.

"We haven't talked in two years because it didn't fit into your plan."

"Well was I supposed to call you, Haven?" she snapped. "I mean, it was so awkward around you! Like you thought you were somehow better than me. And it didn't matter that I'd had more boyfriends than you, been in love, you still seemed happier. It's like I had to compete with you, like we weren't best friends!"

"You made it that way!" I shouted back at her. "I didn't feel that way at all-"

"But I did!" she interrupted. "So I thought that I'd take a break from you, try finding myself on my own."

"Have you?" I question, completely irritated by this point.

"Yeah, I think I have." I let a smile form upon my face.

"Well, as long as you're happy, it's all good." I didn't mean it, but I said it anyway. We sat in awkward silence, each wondering what the right thing would be to say. I stared at my plate, picking at my food.

"Why didn't you try calling more?" I looked up to find her close to tears. "I mean, you were my best friend, and I just thought…I just thought that you would try harder."

"I just-" I caught myself about to say something extremely harmful, but rephrased it. "I just figured that we were both so different to the point where our friendship wouldn't work anymore." She nodded.

"Yeah, we are really different," she agreed, looking herself over, then me. I took a quick look at my watch, then became panicked.

"Oh crap! I've got work. I'm really sorry, I've got to go!" I placed money on the table for the bill. "Maybe we could meet up, like a once a month thing?" Casey nodded.

"Yeah, I'd really like that." I didn't have my best friend back yet, but I was working on it.


	5. Someday We'll Know

That night, I was assigned to rolling meatballs with Wes in the back. Kristie was finally old enough to serve drinks, so she took every opportunity she could, telling Wes to "move his butt right back to the kitchen and leave the drinkers up to her." He and I weren't exactly friends, but we could make decent conversation. Weather, music, etc. Nothing spectacular. Once, he'd told me the story of how he and Macy got together, it was like a fairytale, you know? Something that you really wanted for yourself.

"So how was your day?" he asked after we'd been making meatballs for a few minutes in silence.

"Fine. Your's?" I questioned, trying to sound as normal as possible. Normal was a relative term considering that my sister was going to have a baby, my ex best friend wanted a random dinner with me, and I was about the most pathetic teenager on the face of the planet.

"Pretty good. What'd you do?" I knew he was stretching to make conversation, but I didn't really feel like trying today.

"The usual. School. Dinner at Ashley and Lewis'." He took my emotionless tone as a sign, I suppose, because the next thing he said really shocked me.

"Alright, tell me what's wrong, kid." I looked at him for a moment, and knew that he was looking right through me. He knew that I was in a mood. It amazed me how he knew me without really knowing me at all.

"It's just…" I tried to come up with the right words, but only one word came to mind. Sumner. "Things are changing, and it's just…tough."

"Things change, Haven. It's a part of life." I could feel somewhat of a resentment from him, like he thought I didn't have a right to resent change. He was right, in a way, it's not like I'd lost anyone. I had a mom, dad, stepmother, sister, and a half-brother. I had no right to complain. Well, I had lost one person, not in a physical way, but I'd still lost him. I'd still lost Sumner.

"I know, it's just…" I stopped, not wanting to make him angrier. I continued rolling meatballs, refusing to continue.

"Just?" He was waiting for me to continue, waiting for me to explain. I didn't look at him, focusing my attention on the meatballs.

"Never mind. It's nothing important." She looked up to find Wes' face looking somewhat hurt, like he'd expected that I'd open up to him automatically. I couldn't. This conversation was reminding me more of Sumner than I wanted to remember. I took a tray out of the over saying, "I'm gonna go give these to Bert." Wes nodded, not really seeming to care. It's not that I didn't like Wes, it was just that explaining things to someone who really didn't want to listen to you let off steam wasn't exactly the best thing. When I came back, he turned to the usual topics.

"You going to see Truth Squad this weekend?" he asked as I began rolling meatballs again.

"Yeah. You?" He smiled slightly at this.

"Always do." Just like that and we were settling back into our shallow conversations. They weren't the thought provoking conversations from a love story romance that he'd told me about, but you can only have those kinds of talks with the other main character in your story. The rest of the people who weren't somehow in your everyday life weren't of importance, so your conversation could be cut down. At least, that's how things seemed to be.

When the night was over, Bert once again invited me to the party.

"No thanks," I assured him, waving as he got in the car. It's not that I didn't like Bert, either, but the whole overly nice thing wasn't exactly points for him.

"He really likes you, Haven." Kristie whispered in my ear as she made her way to the retired ambulance.

"Bull," I replied, pretending to be coughing into my hand while saying it. She shrugged her shoulders, deciding I'd find out when it hit me in the face.


End file.
